Does He Love Me? Clear Signs to Know Where You Stand

Does He Love Me
October 22, 2020

You’re past the awkward stage where you can’t seem to figure out whether it’s too soon to call him. He expressed interest in you, and you started dating. But there’s one problem. You’re not sure if he loves you or not.

If you’ve only been dating for a while, it can be challenging to know where he stands. It’s even harder if he’s not a man of many words. So, what do you do? Do you stop wondering and hope he expresses his feelings for you eventually?

While this seems like a reasonable solution, it’s not the best. The last thing you want is to waste time on someone who was never serious about you. It’s essential to know if he is emotionally invested in deciding how committed you want to be.

However, in such situations, it’s never a good idea to ask him outright. He may be serious about you but not quite there emotionally. Therefore, putting him on the spot will make him feel rushed. You don’t want it. So what’s the solution?

We’ve shared some tips on how to tell whether he loves you or not. Find out how much he loves you by observing the little things he does. It’s all in his actions.

Does He Love You: 11 Tell-Tale Signs to Know for Sure

The majority of men are not verbal about their feelings. While, at some point, he will tell you he loves you, it may take time before he gets there. Instead, he will do certain things to show his affection. If you’re not keen on these random acts, you may be fast to assume he is not in love with you.

Don’t be too quick to jump into conclusions. If you’ve not been together for a long time and haven’t said “I love you” to each other, it may be a good idea to read his actions. Actions speak louder than words, after all.

So, does he love you, or should you move on? Let’s find out!

He Respects You

You can tell a lot about how a man feels about you based on how they treat you. Do you feel like he considers your opinions when you have to make decisions together? Does he respect your boundaries? Will he do things without consulting you?

Your answers to these questions should give you an idea of where he stands. A man who loves you will respect you. You will feel that your relationship is an equal playing field where you’re allowed to share your point of view. What’s more, he will want to know what you think about different things before making a decision that involves you.

He Prioritizes You

Your man may not always say what he feels, but his actions will never lie. One way to determine how he feels about you is to analyze his priorities. Are you among his top priorities, or do you fall below the list after everyone else?

Here’s the thing. Everyone has a life, including your boyfriend. Therefore, chances are there are a plethora of things keeping him busy from family and career to friends. Still, if you matter to him, he will always find a way to prioritize you. He’ll cancel plans and go out of his way to be there for you when you need him.

He Protects You

Males are naturally protective of their mate’s wellbeing and safety. Man who loves you will stop at nothing to make sure you’re safe. You’ll see them pull you to the opposite side of the road when you’re walking. They’ll ensure all the doors in your apartment are locked before you retire to bed.

A man who loves you will also have no trouble defending you in public. Whether someone is rude to you at the grocery store or in danger, they will want to protect you. In simple terms, he wants to be your hero.

Also, he falls in love when he sees himself as your hero. Therefore, if your man is not acting very protective, he may not be that into you.

He Opens Up to You

Men are not as emotional as women. They are mostly raised to be macho and not as in touch with their feelings. However, if he loves you, he won’t be afraid to open up to you. A man who loves you will share their fears, insecurities, ambitions, and even stressful situations.

He sees you as his person, and he believes he will genuinely benefit from being open with you. Not to mention, he won’t refuse to answer any questions you have about them. If he loves you, he’ll open up his world to you, including his family and secrets.

He Makes Plans with You

You can also tell he is in it for the long haul if he makes plans with you. Men who don’t want to be tied down won’t make any big plans with you. They just want some fun, and the moment you begin planning, you ruin their plans.

It’s different for a man who loves you. They’ll want to make it clear that they love you. Whether you want him to tag along to a wedding or want to buy a couch together, he is in.

He Checks in Often

How long you go before hearing from him is another tell-tale sign of whether or not he loves you. No matter how busy he is, a man who loves you will always find time to check on you. He may not do it every day, but he will check in to let you know he’s thinking about you.

However, when it comes to it, you need to know that everyone is different. Some men may not text or call often. They’ll show up at your house to see how you’re doing. Also, in a healthy relationship, you shouldn’t expect a constant, round the clock communication. As we mentioned, he also has a life. Therefore, set realistic expectations.

He Offers to Help When You Need It

A man who loves you will also offer help when you need it. Sometimes, it doesn’t have to big things.

He’ll help in small ways such as:

  • Fixing your kitchen sink
  • Getting your groceries
  • Offering to take care of you when you’re sick
  • Lending money when you need it
  • Helping you organize a party for your friend

If he’s always stepping in to make life easier for you, you’ve got yourself a catch that he loves you!

He Shows You Off

Couples are not the same. Some people have no problem with public displays of affection (PDA), and others prefer privacy when expressing their affection. However, even if your man isn’t comfortable making out with you in public, if he loves you, there are certain things he won’t mind.

For instance, if you’re together in public and happen to run into his friends, he will proudly introduce you as his girlfriend. If he doesn’t want to hold your hand in their presence or just introduces you by your name, it should be a red flag.

You Take Vacations Together

If you have plans of vacationing together, whether in two weeks or a year, you can bet on your dollar that he loves you. As we’ve mentioned, a man who loves you won’t be afraid to make plans with you.

However, if he is not that into you, he will make excuses when you bring up such plans. Because he doesn’t see the relationship getting that far, he may prefer weekend getaways instead of a weeklong vacation.

He Knows Your Schedule

If he is in love with you, he will also want to know what you’re up often to make plans. He may also follow up to find out how an interview went or offer to accompany you at events. Such commitment shows that he is invested in the relationship and wants you to know you’re a team.

However, if he only shows up randomly and never checks to see if you’re free, chances are he is only looking to have a good time.

He Teases and Plays with You

Remember the boy who used to tease you in school, and you hated him for the longest time? You were probably irritated and annoyed until someone mentioned that boys tease you if they like you. This trait doesn’t change when men mature into adulthood.

He will tease you to see you smile and laugh. He will also not be afraid to get in touch with his inner child to play and enjoy fun moments with you.

What’s the Verdict?

So, considering these tell-tale signs, can you tell whether he loves you or not? Sometimes, it’s hard to say based only on only these questions, especially if you’ve been dating for a short time. However, these 3 takeaways should help you decide.

These include:

  1. Analyze his consistency in the things he does: is he doing it because he needs something or out of love?
  2. Consider the intention behind his actions, and
  3. Be ready for a verdict

If you’ve tried everything but can’t seem to figure out his stand, it’s advisable to consider counseling. A certified therapist will help you see things clearly and understand your relationship better. Start a live chat today and get the answers you seek here!

Kate Skurat

Kate Skurat

Licensed Mental Health Counselor

Washington, United States

Kate has a B.S. in Psychology and M.A. in Clinical Psychology from Pepperdine University and has worked in healthcare since 2017. She primarily treated depression, anxiety, eating disorders, trauma, and grief, as well as identity, relationship and adjustment issues. Her clinical experience has focused on individual and group counseling, emergency counseling and outreach. Read more.

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