When Should You Give Up On a Girl?

When to Stop Chasing a Girl
October 26, 2020

You may have met a wonderful girl who you would want to date and even marry. But unfortunately, she does not seem interested in being with you. She is engaged in other affairs whenever you want to spend time with her, and she also does not respond enthusiastically when you communicate.

In such cases, you may not know for sure whether she lacks interest in you or if she is just trying to make you work harder. She may also be interested in you but may not intend to pursue a serious relationship at the moment. So, how can you determine whether or not you should stop chasing a girl? Read on to learn about some signs that clearly show that a girl does not want to date you.

List the Qualities You Are Most Interested In

Before you start evaluating a girl’s responses to you, you need to determine whether or not she would be a good fit for you. The best way to do this is to list the qualities you value most in a partner. For example, if you are a Christian, you may only want to date a girl with strong Christian values. Anyone who does not possess your most important qualities should be quickly crossed off the list.

It is important to note that many girls would have some qualities in your list, but they may lack a few other qualities. For this reason, you will need to identify the must-have qualities and separate them from the negotiable ones. The most important qualities should serve as your deal-breakers.

It is also important to have a list of such qualities that you consider the most important. For example, if you are immediately turned off by someone who does not relate well with strangers, you should note this down and pay close attention to it. Listen to how she talks about other people and determine how she treats strangers.

The importance of having such a list cannot be overstated. Although we often know the kind of girl we want, it is easy to feel attracted to girls who do not meet the required qualities. But if you have the list, you will be more likely to give up on girls who would not suit you. It is normal to be conflicted when deciding which qualities you find most important in a woman, and in such cases, you should consider talking to a therapist.

Check for Signs of Disinterest

While some girls just want you to chase them, some signs can clearly show you that a woman does not intend to pursue a relationship with you. One sign that a woman lacks interest in you is if she does not respond in a reasonable period. Also, you should not be the one initiating conversations all the time.

Besides, you should watch her behavior when you are together. Does she keep her eyes glued to her phone? Does she seem distracted? Another important sign is that she does not accept many invitations for hangouts or dates. A person who genuinely likes you will want to spend more time with you, especially if they are planning on dating you. In many cases, girls will even invite you to events or simply for dates. In case the girl sends mixed signals, you can just ask her directly if she is interested in dating you.

When to Stop Chasing a Girl

The relationships usually grow over some weeks or even months. Although you need to be patient, you still need to check for signs of genuine disinterest. One sign that you need to stop chasing a girl is if she always rejects requests for dates in a coffee shop or park.

You should especially be cautious if she accepts invitations only to events as that can mean she is just taking advantage of you. Also, be wary of girls who cancel your plans at the last minute. It usually happens because they use your plans as a back-up. It is also important to respect a girl if she outright tells you she does not want to date you. Very few girls will reject you if they think you might end up in a relationship.

Don’t Settle for Less

Men usually settle for less when they think they cannot easily find someone to love them. You should not settle for a girl who disrespects you, whether in private or public. Also, you stop chasing a girl if she displays signs of disinterest. Being confident and knowing that you are worthy of love will help eliminate unsuitable women. It will also attract the right woman. Note that women generally prefer confident men.

When Should You End Relationships?

You may already be dating a girl and are now wondering whether you need to keep pursuing the relationship. It can happen because the girl seems to have lost interest in the relationship. You should also consider ending the relationship if you have extreme feelings of resentment and if the contentment level has gone down drastically.

There are many things that can indicate that a girl is no longer interested in dating you. For example, she may keep complaining about everything you do. Also, girls tend to be easily irritated when dealing with men they are no longer interested in.

You should not insist on pursuing a relationship if it is weighing you down and affecting your mental health negatively. Many people stick to dysfunctional relationships because they feel like they have invested too much time in them. You should be ready to move on even if you have spent many years dating.

You also need to end a relationship if it has grown to be extremely abusive, both physically and verbally. It may be harder to recognize the signs of emotional abuse, but if you are uncomfortable in the relationship, you can speak to a therapist. Such professionals can help fix a relationship if both parties are interested in continuing the relationship.

Kate Skurat

Kate Skurat

Licensed Mental Health Counselor

Washington, United States

Kate has a B.S. in Psychology and M.A. in Clinical Psychology from Pepperdine University and has worked in healthcare since 2017. She primarily treated depression, anxiety, eating disorders, trauma, and grief, as well as identity, relationship and adjustment issues. Her clinical experience has focused on individual and group counseling, emergency counseling and outreach. Read more.

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